July, 2009

Is it the 20s again?

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/31

Expecting mothers in the state of New Jersey may want to leave the state to deliver their child. Two years ago, protective services took a woman's newborn infant away from her because she refused to accept a cesarean section while in labor. However, the baby was delivered healthy without the c-section, but the mother's refusal and overall belligerent attitude (during a pregnancy? Surely you jest!) was apparently enough to have child protective services take the baby away from the mother and father! Recently, New Jersey courts upheld the decision, preventing the mother from getting custody of their child, now two-years-old.

Meanwhile, in New York, the FBI busted 44 mayors, rabbis, local officials, legislators, and citizens for trafficking human kidneys. Awesome!

You too can read the amazing Blasphemer's Bible!

If you own an Amazon Kindle, you no longer own a copy of Orwell's 1984. In fact, one 17-year-old boy is suing Amazon for deleting his digital copy of 1984, because he wasn't able to finish writing his book report! While I agree that Amazon should never have the ability to delete anything without your consent, I doubt this teen is the hard-working straight-A-receiving prodigy that his lawyer is making him out to be. Any student who actually cared about their grade would just buy a $5 paperback and finish their book report the old-fashioned way. This little booger is just looking for a handout.

Here we are, the last day of July, and the temperature still only barely lets you know that it's summer. I am not amused.


Hmmm...

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/30

Yes, you too can experience The Blasphemer's Bible!

And I thought Canadians were all nice simple folk. Not the kind of people who would lie about having a brain tumor.

How much money have you been wasting on expensive junk with extremely cheap ingredients?


My Internet is better than your Internet!

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/29

I've added three new Commander Keen fonts to the Game Font Database.

Read The Blasphemer's Bible!

Pixelvader is a pretty cool game.

Here are 25 behind-the-scenes Star Wars pictures you've never seen before.

Some people out there (you know who you are) have just been jumping for joy over Google's new planned OS. Well, before you get too happy, you may want to look at ten things that the Google OS won't be able to do.


In the dark of the night I was tossing and turning

Feeling: Sleepy

2009/07/28

Three more fonts have been added to the Game Font Database; all Sonic the Hedgehog related.

Another panel in The Blasphemer's Bible is online.

There is a new version of my space shooter game. The new version has a beginning demo with a title screen, instructions screen, and high score list (which is not yet implemented). It also has animated explosions, and a tally screen after each boss that gives you bonus points on how accurate your shots were.

You know what I find very awesome... the common adjectives used to indicate size (large, medium, and small) are in alphabetical order. :-)

Do you remember the days when you could publish a book and not have to worry about euphemisms. The authors of this book sure do!


Searching for signs of life, but there's nobody home

Feeling: Dazed

2009/07/27

I had intended to spend the weekend camping, but the intermittent rain put an end to those plans. I still had a fun weekend by heading down to Dearborn with Cody to meet up with Lindsey, Britt, Amanda, and Julie to go to the drive-in. It was quite reminiscent of crazy high school adventures. We all crammed, quite uncomfortably, in the back of a small Trail Blazer and sat through four hours of bad movies while it rained outside. I hadn't been to a drive-in since the mid 1980s, so it was mostly a new experience. After the movies we went to IHOP for dinner and then lazed around in their parking lot. I finally made it home by 5:00 AM feeling nice and dead.

Most people are by now aware that our television broadcasts are making their way into space. Any aliens that may exist would be able to construct a device similar to our TV sets and watch our exciting programs like Oprah telling us to think happy thoughts to cure cancer and the bloody, yet somehow hilarious, jokes of Hawkeye from MASH. Well, here is what our alien friends would be watching depending on how far away they are from our planet.

The Blasphemer's Bible is still moving along.

A couple new fonts have been added to the Game Font Database.

A father is convicted of manslaughter, a mother gets acquitted, and, once again, the Lord works in mysterious ways. And by "mysterious ways", I mean, allows a 15-month-old infant to die a horrible death.

Enjoy these 19 death-defying acts that I will not be copying any time soon.


Still raining... still.

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/24

And you thought your airport horror stories were bad! Then, continue to be outraged by 911 operators who are total douche bags.

Read The Blasphemer's Bible. It has a whale.

Off to enjoy some music, singing, and dancing with my homies tonight. I was hoping to go camping this weekend, but it looks like it's going to rain the whole time, so that's not gonna happen. Maybe I'll go outside and see if I can catch hypothermia like my mother always told me.


Still raining...

Feeling: Okay

2009/07/23

I've made another update for my shooter game. Enemy animation has begun, a particle system has been added, and five more waves have been tacked on.

Dara O'Briain is a funny man.

Read The Blasphemer's Bible. It has a duckie.

100 things kids of today may never know about.

Indeed, lamest fight ever. You'd think the Koreans would lay some hapkido down on each other.


A nice long summer of rain

Feeling: Cold Sore

2009/07/22

I've updated the PHP of The Blasphemer's Bible a bit. The comment box is a little bigger, blank lines are now displayed properly in comments, and the index list now only displays 25 thumbnails per page.

Speaking of blasphemy, David Mitchell and Robert Webb are, as the limeys would say, bloody brilliant! Really!


Off to save the world again

Feeling: Cold Sore

2009/07/21

I've added an updated version of my Shooter game. It has a newer layout, some graphics, and some other features. If anyone out there can help with some pixel art, I would appreciate it, throw me an email.

This summer has been rather disappointing so far. Here we are, nearing the end of July, and we've only had like two days get above 90°F.

There is an old saying that, "the proof is in the pudding." This seems quite apt when you look at the aftermath of ex-president Bush's abstinence-only sexual education program. Not only did teen pregnancy rise, but so did the number of cases of STDs.

Oh no! A solar eclipse! Don't let your children be born! Food will become poison! Rioters will run amok! At least, that's what people are saying in the more ignorant areas of India.

Masturbation is alive and well in the animal kingdom.

The Blasphemer's Bible, yup yup.

Remember the high times of the late 1800s to early 1900s? Neither do most of the people who lived through them because they were always stoned!


There is a town that I live in and it's a town that favors winners

Feeling: Cold Sore

2009/07/20

I had a wonderfully busy weekend. On Friday night I went to go see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince with my friends. While it was certainly better than movies 4 and 5, it still had a lot of the failings of the average Harry Potter movies. Several great scenes were cut, and oddly, a couple completely new scenes were added. The movie focused a lot less on the darker imagery of the book and a lot more on the snogging, which created some wonderfully awkward moments, but was kind of a let down from a violence perspective.

Saturday morning I took Chloe in for her 40,000 mile service; played Super Mario Bros. up to world 7 without warps; went to the mall; met up with Devin and Jessie; and introduced them to the awesomeness of Kung Fu Hustle.

On Sunday I had breakfast with Devin, Justin, and Alex, then I went to a wonderful low tea put on by Sarah. A great deal of my friends were there and we sampled various teas, sandwiches, and sweets. It was really quite lovely. After that, I went out to play pool with friends, until 11.

For those of you who didn't watch Sotomayor's confirmation hearings, they went a little something like this.

The Blasphemer's Bible rolls on.


It's -not- perpetual bliss

Feeling: Cold Sore

2009/07/17

Yesterday evening, while driving home from work, I noticed that I was getting a cold sore on my lip. I thought, well this sucks, but it shouldn't interfere with my life, since I'm not doing anything for the next few days. So, I played some DDR with my friends at the roller rink, and just as we were finishing up, a woman skates by me, starts chatting with me, and invites me out dancing with her and her friends. Typical. I haven't had a cold sore since January, and not once, in the past six months, has a girl asked me out--then, the day when I get one (the day when it's the most contagious), I'm asked out dancing. Well, I went dancing with her regardless, and just made sure that nobody tried to kiss me (which is pretty difficult to do, considering how sexy I am). Despite terrible club music, it was a fun night.

Have a look at the biggest tech flops from the past decade.

For some strange reason I have the song "This Kiss" by Faith Hill stuck in my head. This is odd because 1.) I haven't heard the song in awhile. 2.) The song is terrible and should never exist. Damn earworms.

I've posted an early version of a shooter game I've been working on.

Another panel in The Blasphemer's Bible is up.

It turns out Google has left an easter egg for us to find.

I'm going to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince tonight with some of my homeboys.


I'm not prejudiced, I hate everyone

Feeling: Annoyed

2009/07/16

The Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act (AKA the Matthew Shepard Act) is being added as an amendment to the latest "must-pass" defense bill. Sure, they have nothing to do with each other, but that's the beauty of the USA's asinine legislation system. What the Matthew Shepard Act does is increase the definition of "hate crime" to include sex, gender, gender identity, and disability along with the already existing race, religion, and ethnicity categories. It also forces the FBI to track these crimes better, increases the types of crimes which can count as hate crimes, and gives $10 million in funding for two years of investigations. In the USA, if you're convicted of a hate crime you'll have a more severe sentence than someone who performed an identical crime, which was not motivated by prejudice.

There is a much better term for the "hate crime", and that is "thought-crime". Thought crime is a term used when it becomes illegal to have a particular opinion or think certain thoughts, and that is precisely what the hate crime acts of the US are doing. While proponents of hate crime claim that it isn't thought crime because it only applies to your actions, they're wrong. If I kill someone, I'm guilty of murder, and I'll be punished accordingly because murder is the crime. If I murder someone because I don't like the color of their skin, then I'll not only be punished for the murder, but I'll be given an additional punishment because of my opinion about the color of their skin. The extra punishment only exists because of my thoughts; thus making it a thought crime.

Being prejudice in the USA is not illegal; in fact, it's protected by the US constitution, and for good reason. People should be allowed to think what ever they want in this country. Thinking does not hurt anyone, only actions do, and harmful actions are already crimes. If you commit a crime you should be punished for your crime, and only your crime. Being punished for the motivation of your crimes goes against the foundation of this country, and there is no place in a free-thinking civilized society for legislation that punishes you for having opinions.

Some people take fandom a little too far, like people the create an entire unauthorized musical based on a book series.

How do your balls scale up? Here is a large image featuring a side-by-side comparison of the size of the balls from various sports.

The Blasphemer's Bible. You know you want it.

DDR tonight for the win!


But first, before we go that far: what's your name?

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/15

I had a dentist appointment this morning. I don't have any cavities and I was even complemented on how healthy my gums were. That hasn't happened since I was six.

Well this doesn't seem like it should be on a children's program.

Rite-Aid gets a slap on the wrist for their Airborne rip off that was equally ineffective. $500,000... yeah, that'll learn 'em right good!

The Blasphemer's Bible is still going strong.

No mother, my neck isn't sore in the least. :-)


Summer's going to take the pain away

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/14

I finished reading two books last night. Trick or Treatment is a book offering a clinical view of the alternative health industry. It explains what tests have been done on the more common alternative methods, the results of those tests, and any possible health concerns that people should know about. The results were mostly negative. Nearly all alternative medicines that actually go through clinical testing are shown to be ineffective or harmful. There are a few that can be useful under certain circumstances, but other, more mainstream, treatments are more effective, safer, and cheaper. My only problem with the book is that they didn't offer any references for the clinical trials they were citing.

The other book I finished is Essentials of Philosophy. It offers a quick overview of history's major philosophers and the various schools of thought that people have had over the years. I found the book to be informative, but I took issue with their section on religion. They followed popular culture claiming several religious stories were true, when in fact there is quite a bit of archeological evidence that they're not. They also repeated the urban legend that people only use 10% of their brains, which is just wrong.

I've added three new fonts to the Game Font Database.

Are you an Internet addict? Were you thinking about getting electroshock therapy to cure yourself? Well, you can't do it in China anymore--they just banned it.

It used to be that most dangerous thing people could do was walk and chew gum at the same time. However, now it seems that walking and texting can be even more dangerous. Just ask the girl who was too busy texting to realize that she was walking into an open sewage shaft.

You should read The Blasphemer's Bible.

When you go to rob a store with a toy gun, make sure you remove the bright orange tip first.


Monday the 13th... evil day!

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/13

I'm surprisingly chipper for a Monday morning, but I had an awesome weekend, so it fits. On Friday night I went to The Machine Shop to watch Möthra play. They've really refined their sound, and it's always fun to help support my homies. After the show, about 18 of us went to Archie's to annoy the servers and other patrons by ordering very little food and making lots of noise.

On Saturday, Lauren and I tagged along with the Youmacon zoo outing. I already knew about a third of the group because they were already my friends or I'd met them before, and it was fun meeting several new people. A couple of them were lacking in social graces, but what can you expect from a group of anime geeks? After the zoo, the bulk of us walked around Royal Oak. We stopped at Leo's Coney Island, Barnes and Noble, and Noir Leather before heading on back home. It was a blast. I did some recuperation on Sunday, but I also hit up the mall and hung out with some homies.

Are any of my readers old enough to remember when advertisements were horrifyingly scary?

Yeah, it's still bad for you--but see how good it can look!

While I'm still going to plug The Blasphemer's Bible, I'd also like to point you to today's SMBC, which fits in well with it.

Did your daughter get knocked up? Just blame it on the hotel pool!

And I thought my dad was a terrible father!

I've gotten hooked on the show Dead Like Me. It's very funny and introspective at the same time. Mandy Patinkin is a spectacular actor.


Save the llamas!

Feeling: Excited

2009/07/10

The family of barn swallows that nested in my carport are all grown up and flying on their own now. The hood of my car is no longer a bird poop receptacle.

I was having a little chat with an art major and we both exclaimed our disgust for the work of Barnett Newman. His work can be described as painting a canvas one color, and then putting a vertical stripe down the center in a different color. Amazing! Genius! Talent! Creative! It's so complicated even an infant could do it!

The Blasphemer's Bible!

I'm heading off to the zoo tomorrow! The forecast is calling for rain, but I'm hoping there will just be some nice clouds to block most of the sun.


I like videogames

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/09

I played some serious DDR with my homeboys yesterday. By the end of the night I was dripping in sweat and totally out of energy. Gotta love working out while also listening to fun music and being with your buddies.

You've got to love those incredibly stupid races from Star Trek.

Have you ever heard of The Blasphemer's Bible? No? Well, then you should check it out!

My latest project that I've been working on is a front end for all my videogames. It's a list of all my games, some forms to add new ones, the ability to set up emulators for each, and a preview of the game. I'll get some screenshots up once I have all of the bugs worked out of it.


All those porcelain models, if only I could make them fall

Feeling: Happy

2009/07/08

Google plans to release a new open-source operating system for netbooks by 2010. They claim to be taking a "it just works" approach like Macintosh. I have to admit, I'm a little frightened. The "it just works" model can usually be translated into "we control everything you do".

Alternative therapy advocates are a hearty breed. You can explain to them what a placebo is, you can explain to them how medicine is tested, you can even show the thousands of failed clinical trials, but they'll still cling to their magic crystals, acupuncture needles, and snake oil. Well, the guys over at "That Mitchell and Webb Look" have tried a different approach. Out-right ridicule.

You should do yourself a favor and read The Blasphemer's Bible.

Did you ever think to yourself, "I would like an 8 foot long replica of the original NES"? Well, this guy did!

Star Trek bloopers are hilarious!


I want a hotter summer!

Feeling: Okay

2009/07/07

Here we are, well into July, and there have been only a few hot days. What kind of summer is this? I want weather so hot that I'm forced to go swimming for fear of heat stroke! This mid-70s crap just doesn't cut it! spray some CFCs into the air, turn on all your law mowers at once, get rid of that stupid o-zone layer! Screw the grand kids; I'm cold now!

For those of you still worried that you may be overweight because you have a high BMI (body mass index), stop being worried. The BMI is bogus.

These days amusement parks are pretty boring. Why are they boring? Because they're too safe. Nobody ever dies at them anymore. Well, Popular Mechanics has made a list of the more deadly rides from a bygone era.

The Blasphemer's Bible is aching to be read.


And stuff

Feeling: Dazed

2009/07/06

I had a wonderful weekend. First, I found out that my grandmother has only one more chemo treatment left and then she's finished (hopefully forever!). Saturday evening a lot of my friends gathered together at Rachel's parent's place to party it up. We played volleyball, had a bonfire, lit off a multitude of fireworks, and had a blastifferic time. I got to flirt with some of Rachel's single friends, which made the event all the more enjoyable. I didn't make it home until 6:30! The bulk of Sunday was spent recovering from Saturday.

Is your life average too?

If you've never seen Douglas Adams speak, you should watch this speech. He was a hilarious man.

This is why you're fat!

In case you haven't read The Blasphemer's Bible you should.


Holy crap, a talking muffin!

Feeling: Invincible

2009/07/03

Here are some photography lessons for complete idiots.

One of the upsides of living in North Korea is that you never have to watch commercials on TV because they strictly control all commerce to ensure that their citizens don't become fat capitalist slobs like us Americans. Funny thing though, North Korea just put a commercial on their air waves in which they explain how you can become healthy and live longer simply by drinking beer. This is actually an excellent strategy. If you can't afford to feed the masses, at least shut them up by getting them all really drunk.

My almost-date went well; the woman is both intelligent and friendly. However, she doesn't like the color of my car, so she's obviously not girlfriend material.

You should probably read The Blasphemer's Bible and vote for it.

Fear the ninja cat.

Enjoy the 4th of July weekend. Remember, if you don't light off a bunch of fireworks, then you don't love your country!


And who's to care if I grow my hair to the sky?

Feeling: Flirty

2009/07/02

Finally! A homeopathic cure that actually works!

Enjoy the dumbest moments in business from the first half of 2009.

I have an almost-date tonight! I say "almost-date" because the girl I'm going to dinner with finds long hair on guys to be a major turn-off (this is, no doubt, a red flag that she has serious mental issues). The important thing is that she's a physics major, so we'll have some interesting questions, I'm sure.

The Blasphemer's Bible wants voting.

Want to waste time on a computer? Check out webcrosswords.com.

Last night, while playing DDR with my homies, I watched my friend John get two AAAs in a row! The first was on Butterfly, the second on Freckles. We were all very happy for him, and it was quite exciting to watch.


Mysteries are not necessarily miracles. ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Feeling: Aggravated

2009/07/01

152 people died in the Yemeni plane crash, and 1 teenage girl survived by holding onto floating debris. France's minister for international cooperation, Alain Joyandet, said, "It is a true miracle." Joyandet added about the survivor, "She is a courageous young girl." How does one's desire to not drown make one "courageous"? What happened is tragic, and we're all happy that the girl survived. However, 152 people are still dead. That is not a miracle, and she is not a hero. Trying to canonized the poor girl won't make the event any less tragic and only serves to debase actual heroes.

For those of you who don't understand what fireworks have to do with Independence Day, please read this.

The Blasphemer's Bible continues unabated.